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I dont want to have sex with my husband

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I married as a virgin and had an active sex life in the early years, usually initiated by. I decide where we live, how to manage our finances and where to go on holiday.

He has always been kind when not asking for sexgenerous and responsible. How do I get my sexual life back to normal? Mariella replies The million dollar question: You offer plenty of detail on what you perceive to be contributing factors to your loss of sexual appetite, but whether you are Muslim, Christian, Jewish, atheist or of any other belief system, having sex with the same person over a lifetime eventually gets i dont want to have sex with my husband be a chore.

Sex is like cooking dinner: For you, it may be even more of a challenge to entertain the prospect of intercourse having rarely enjoyed a climax. Taking control of your sexuality and understanding your own needs are as important as providing for your partner.

It would appear that years of dutiful compliance have worn you down, and at least half of that responsibility has to go to you. Your husband sounds like a decent, understanding man who has failed to read your mind.

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That makes you neither unusual nor unreasonable. Then again, sex is never just sex.

Expressing physical passion and withholding it is part of any relationship and is as much about control as choosing your family vacation. You can, of course, run away with someone who offers more in the sexual satisfaction stakes, but I wonder if initially you need to do some work yourself before any change will occur.

If you have a dilemma, send a brief email to mariella. Follow her on Twitter mariellaf1.

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